Have you or anyone you know been a victim of sexual abuse or assault?
I’m asking because I’m so stunned by the sheer numbers of people that come to our retreats who have this as something that happened to them. And so saddened by the fact that this haunts them throughout their lives.
It’s happened to both men and women, sometimes when they were very young, and almost none of them told anyone about it.
So the terrible parts for this, for me, in addition to what happened, is then what happens after that.
I’m amazed at the number of stories I’ve been told of people telling their parent, usually their mother, and not being believed.
Or worse, being blamed that they somehow brought this on themselves.
And then the number of people who somehow blame themselves for what happened. Especially teenagers or people who were on a date and because they were being friendly or because they had something to drink, they’re blaming themselves.
And it’s people from every walk of life – every ethnicity, male, female, upper class, middle class, lower class – it’s so pervasive that I actually feel it is a type of epidemic.
I was reading recently that when Freud did his initial work, he was working primarily with women in the upper class of Vienna and he was discovering that huge numbers of them were saying that they had been sexually abused by a family member, usually a father or a brother. When he first started talking about it, there was such an uproar, that he changed his analysis. He started talking about it as though the women had made it up, that they were “hysterical.”
And the worst part is the cover up. The person tells someone, they’re not believed and so they shut up about it. And then they carry it with them, this huge weight that is dragging them down.
And then here’s another worst part, (I keep saying this is the worst part, because there’s so many terrible parts to this), it gets twisted into this terrible belief that they take on that this happened because there’s something wrong with them. Or now that it happened, there’s something wrong with them.
And then, like I said, they carry it around.
We’ve had people come to us where this happened over 40 years ago and they’re still suffering, or 30 years ago, or 20 years ago, and they still feel it like a scar, like a wound.
If this is something that has happened to you or someone you deeply care about, I want to reach out to you to lay this burden down. This pain doesn’t need to be carried around any longer.
This energy can be released and you can come back into connection on all levels – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Because it affects people on those levels.
- Some people don’t physically enjoy sex any longer because of the abuse, or it’s painful for them, either physically or emotionally.
- The emotional pain typically shows up in feelings of inadequacy.
- The mental part is all the thoughts racing in your head of “there’s something wrong with me,” “this is my fault,” “I’ll never get over this,” “my life is ruined.”
- The spiritual part shows up in different ways. The spiritual aspect is about beliefs, so you take on those untrue thoughts that there’s something wrong with you. But on an even deeper level, we’ve found many people who have lost their faith, in that “how could God let something like this happen to me?” It’s especially insidious when it’s been a father, because for a young child, the father can represent God.
We have helped so many people who have had this happen to them. If this is something that is still haunting you or someone you deeply care about, please call us and let us help.
Call and speak with one of our Angel Guides. For some people, this is the hardest part, speaking about it, sometimes for the very first time. Our Angel Guides, are incredible, they are so compassionate and caring, you’ll feel better just having spoken with them. And it’s so freeing to finally talk about it with someone who cares.
When they speak with you, they’ll tune it and determine exactly how the impact of this is showing up for you, because it’s different for everyone. Some people are depressed, some people are angry, some people are ashamed. For some, it has greatly impacted their relationships, for others, it has greatly impacted their feelings of empowerment or inadequacy, for some, it has even impacted how they show up in the world. And it can definitely impact how you are as a partner and as a parent.
However it’s showing up for you, they’ll get to the root of it and put together a retreat of private sessions designed to move out the old, hurtful energy and moving you into connection on all levels – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.
Or if you’d prefer, call us toll-free at 1-877-204-3664 (US and Canada). For our friends outside the US and Canada, call 01 928-204-5988 or click here and one of our Retreat Guides will call you.
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Julianne says that after her Soul Adventure she feels happier, enlightened and TALLER! “I was freed from this shame I have carried through my life.”
“I was totally meant to go to Sedona. It is a magical place with incredible people. During my retreat, I felt myself change, a warm yellow light grew from inside of me. By my last day, I felt taller, happier, enlightened, I felt I finally awoke that wonderful, beautiful spirit deep inside of me that was afraid to come out. I was freed from this shame I have carried through my life. I wish for every human person to go through an experience like mine, it was worth every penny. I will go back to Sedona without a doubt.”
~ Julianne V., Ottawa, Canada
I love it so much that Julianne’s retreat helped her so deeply and isn’t it sweet, she says her Soul Adventure made her feel TALLER! That’s a new one.
But that’s exactly what happens. Shame (or depression or feeling “less than,” etc.) does that to you. It makes you feel smaller. It makes you feel less than. When those blocks are gone and that “wonderful beautiful spirit deep inside of you” comes through, you’re suddenly lighter and happier, and that literally makes you stand up taller! It’s so amazing.














































So this is the idea — The first 90 minutes of your day are the most important. That’s when you are most productive, you have the most focus, you have the highest levels of energy and willpower.
When we do surveys each year asking people what they want in their lives, I used to be surprised that the #1 answer every single year was “Peace.”
If you Google it, you’ll find that many, many successful people, including people like Jerry Seinfeld and Ellen Degeneres, mediate every single day.
Lots of people like to use the early morning hours for working with their physical body. Running, stretching, doing some type of exercise… I know for myself, if I don’t do it in the morning, it generally doesn’t get done. Studies are showing that even 20 minutes of exercise can have huge benefits on our physical bodies, and don’t you find that when you exercise, you actually feel better emotionally and your mind is sharper?
One of the three things that showed up this week was I reminded of the before 5 am website, whose founder believes that your most important things need to happen before 5 am. And while I’m not saying that everyone has to get up at 4 am, what I am saying is that you can have absolute control over these precious hours if you make the commitment to do that.
And maybe you’re a person who absolutely cannot get up that early and it will not work for you. Okay, I get it, but is there some other time during the day you can carve out just for yourself?
Every morning I start with a few minutes of the HeartMath Heart Coherence Technique. If you don’t know what that is, Google it, its effects are astounding and it just takes a few minutes.
In this series of videos, I’ve been talking to you about burnout, because it’s such a serious issue and so many people are suffering from it. 
If this is the first of these videos that you’ve watched, let me back up just a little to talk about what burnout is. HelpGuide defines Burnout as:
And it’s important to note that burnout is different than stress. Stress spikes, burnout is just getting to the point where you feel like you just can’t take it anymore and you just don’t want to do anything, you’re listless and just disinterested.
If this is happening in your life, I can’t tell you how important it is to deal with it. Study after study is showing the kind of continual stress that leads to burnout is directly linked to heart attack, stroke, cancer and a compromised immune system.
Study after study shows that three of the easiest things that you can start doing right now, today are:
And of course, everyone’s first reaction is, “I don’t have time for any of those and I can’t meditate, I have monkey mind.”
Get up 1 hour earlier. Studies have shown that just 30 minutes of exercise is optimal for everything that your body needs. And even the Dalai Lama says that he has monkey mind – everyone has monkey mind – so find a meditation that will work for you and keep at it. Stop watching TV at night, stop playing video games, go to bed one hour earlier.
When we get stressed, we go into fight or flight and our body starts pumping cortisol and we start breathing rapidly. It’s our caveman brain acting like we’re running away from a tiger. The problem is our brain doesn’t know the difference between a tiger and an upset at work; our brain makes our body react the same way to any stress.
All of this that I’m talking about is about Being Mindful. Notice what’s happening, be present, stop, breathe.
If so, you’ve got to figure out a way that works for you to calm yourself down. This is what I talk about in my book, The Journey to Happy – How Embracing the Concept that Nothing is Wrong Can Transform Your Life. This is the way to flip the switch out of stress and back into peace.
Because here’s the thing -– stress comes from what you’re believing about your situation and yourself, and that’s making you fearful and triggering the stress response.