How to Have the Relationship of Your Dreams

I want to talk to you today about, How to Have the Relationship of Your Dreams. Because I know from my own experience, that it’s possible.  
Everyone talks about unconditional love, but have you ever really given that, except possibly to a baby? It seems we can do it for a little while, but then those darn old conditions start coming in, don’t they?  
“If he would just (fill in the blank), then I would be happy”  
“If she would just let me (fill in the blank), then I would be happy.”  
After all these years of working with couples (20 years as a divorce attorney, 17 years with Sedona Soul Adventures), I’ve finally decided that what we all really want is for someone to GET us. To know everything there is to know about us (all the good stuff, all the “bad” stuff, all the weird stuff) but even after all that, they still love us and want to be with us. For me that is truly the definition of unconditional love.  
And the quickest way I’ve found to get there is this — If you want the relationship of your dreams, you need to take the other person off the hook.  
With all the couples retreats that we’ve done over the years, the theme that we see over and over again, is that each person isn’t loving the other person for who they truly are. They say they love them, but they simply want them to be completely different! They want us to “Fix” them – have them change so that they can love them.  
In every moment, we can either choose love or something else — upset, fear, jealousy, frustration. How do you want to live your life? I highly recommend living it from Love.  
The problem is, most people don’t know how to do that. When something happens, we don’t have the tools to communicate our hurt and our loss to our partners in a way that they can receive it, and we don’t know how to let go of the hurts of the past that still haunt us. Sometimes people are holding onto things that happened long ago in the past.  
When I was a divorce attorney, I had a case where the people were both 75 and they had been married for over 50 years. I wanted to have them go into marriage counseling and so did the other attorney and the judge. The marriage counselor spent two months with them seeing them every week and she finally contacted all of and said, “There’s nothing I can do. They are both still really, really angry over things that happened over 40 years ago and they just can’t get beyond it.” And it wasn’t huge things, like infidelity… one of the things was something about buying an expensive vacuum cleaner! I’m sorry, but it’s just not worth busting up a family over a fight about a vacuum cleaner.
Last year we had a couple who came here and their marriage was pretty much over. They had been together for over 20 years, they have 2 beautiful children in high school. They started out really loving each other, but over the years, they had grown completely apart with many different interests that seemed incompatible. The sizzle was completely gone and worse, their respect for each other had been eroded by things that had happened in the past, especially from some nasty fights that had taken place, where words were said that couldn’t be taken back.
They had actually separated and she had already contacted a divorce attorney. In a last ditch effort, he convinced her to come to Sedona to do a couples retreat. Their goals were different — he wanted to save the marriage, she wanted to make the divorce go more smoothly. They were both miserable and unhappy.  
In their first couples session, they both acknowledged how much they had loved each other over the 20 years they had been together. They also identified when things had started to go off the rails, which led to his feelings of inadequacy and her feelings of disrespect toward him.  
Then they both did separate Emotional Clearing sessions…
In her session, she realized how she was living out a pattern of her mother disrespecting her father. She came to a huge realization that her mother’s disrespect of her father had triggered feelings of inadequacy within her. This often happens when parents disrespect each other, because children have this innate knowing that their mother is part of them, their father is part of them. So when her mother disrespected her father, she began to (unconsciously) believe there was something wrong with her.
She had never dealt with these feelings of inadequacy. All of that was cleared out, and then her practitioner helped her clear out all the pain and grief she had accumulated over the last few years when the marriage was falling apart. She told me she felt like this huge weight had been lifted.  
In his emotional clearing session, he realized that her disrespect of him had triggered his own feelings of “not enough.” His practitioner dug deep and they discovered an event that had happened with his father. In a moment of frustration and thoughtlessness, his father said to his 6-year-old son, “You’re worthless.” This had cut deep into him, in a way he never understood until then. He had unconsciously held onto that pain all these years.
He experienced a similar release as his wife, with lots of crying, that he said felt so cleansing. He told me, “I was always taught that men aren’t supposed to cry, but I can’t believe how good that felt, to finally let go of all that.”  
Both of them were triggering each other’s unhealed feelings of inadequacy.
It’s the ultimate irony, isn’t it? That the person who is “supposed” to love us the most, is actually triggering these deep feelings of not-enoughness? But that’s the nature of relationships. Our deepest relationships trigger our unhealed parts and bring them up for healing. It’s the crucible – burning off the impurities to get to the gold of a healed heart.  
Most people don’t understand that this is really what’s happening in our relationships. It’s not so much what the other person is “doing” or “not doing” – the other person is triggering old wounds that are coming up for healing. Wounds that usually happened in childhood and don’t even have anything to do with our partner.
But the really amazing part for both of them came in their breath journeys, which they each did separately.  
The Breath Journey took her into the altered state very easily and suddenly she saw her mother (who had passed away many years ago). In that moment, her mother seemed to be the embodiment of love. Her mother communicated her deep love for her and also her deep love for her father. She had this huge realization that, “Everything is all about love,” there really isn’t anything else that matters. Suddenly, she felt her heart burst open with the deep love for her husband that had always been there, but had just been covered over with the slings and arrows of the past few years. She saw an image of she and her husband walking together in what appeared to be some sort of paradise, blissfully happy.  
In his breathwork session, he saw lots of images and colors, which intrigued him because he doesn’t think of himself as very visual, very creative or very spiritual, so this was a really new experience for him. And then suddenly his father was there with him. His father communicated his deep love that he had for his son. He also communicated that his son needed to become more of a man. Not a macho type of manliness, but the man who takes care of his woman and takes care of his family, and lets them know he is there for them. He realized he had abdicated this role and that his wife no longer felt cared for by him. He said it was the strangest thing, but that after the session, he actually felt “stronger.”  
After these amazing clearings, healings and realizations, they then came together for a Couples session. Both of them were so full of love for each other, they were almost bursting. Their marriage was completely restored. Along the way with their other sessions, they received tools for continuing to have all of this continue to go deeper and to maintain, especially through deep and honest communication.  
The best part was that after they went home, they continued to use the tools and their love just came through deeper and deeper. They came back again a few weeks ago to take their relationship to an even deeper level and they’ve never been so happy. They both said the most amazing thing was that some of the same things are still going on as before — their interests are somewhat divergent and there are issues with work. But for both of them, it just doesn’t matter. They’ve taken the other person off the hook. They both feel loved and respected by the other, and that’s the most critical piece for both of them. The smaller issues just don’t seem that important any longer.  
I love this so much. It’s so incredible what can happen when we finally release the wounds of the past and move into love. It changes everything.  
How is your relationship doing? Is it blissful and fabulous, or are you just going through the motions? Are you “going along to get along” or are you happily and deeply in love? Do you feel loved, respected and cherished?
Make the decision to come back into love.
The problems that you are facing may actually be the result of wounds from the past, rather than that person who you think is doing things to hurt you.  
Connect with us and let’s find out. Let’s find out what’s blocking you from having the relationship of your dreams. It may be something completely different from what you think it is. Whatever it is, we can help you both come back into love within yourselves and with each other.  
I hope this helped, and if you got value from this video, please take the time to like it, share it with someone in your life who think might get something out of it, subscribe to our channel.

And If you want an even more direct path to having the relationship of your dreams, click here to get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Couples Retreats today.
Or if you’d like to talk to someone about doing a retreat that’s custom designed for you call us at (928) 204-5988.
You can have the life  AND the relationship you want – I know it.

What is the Sedona Effect and How Can it Change Your Life?

Today I want to tell you about “The Sedona Effect,” what it is, how it changed my life and how since 2002 I’ve helped thousands of individuals and couples use it to transform their lives and relationships.
What I call the Sedona Effect consists of three things – three different types of energy that combine in a special way to make Transformation and Permanent Change possible.
The 3 different parts of The Sedona Effect are:

1.   The Vortex energy of Sedona
2.   Master healers are drawn to Sedona to do their work
3.   Intense desire (energy) for transformation

Let me explain…
1. The Vortex Energy of Sedona
The first type of energy that goes into The Sedona Effect is the incredible vortex energy of Sedona. I spoke in more depth about “What is a Vortex” in the last video, but let’s recap some of that here. Sedona is known around the world as a Mecca of New Age spirituality. The Native Americans believe (and I certainly believe it to be true) that Sedona is a Power Spot on the planet and that the energy of Sedona can be used for Transformation.
The other element of the Sedona energy is that in this special place, Everything is amplified, meaning energy is amplified, love is amplified, connection is amplified, disconnection is amplified. Whatever you bring to Sedona is magnified and amplified. Thoughts, feelings, vibrations, whether positive or negative, will be more greatly enhanced and intensified on all levels – Physical, Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual.
The energy of Sedona brings your emotional and spiritual bodies into alignment with the planet’s heartbeat.
It pulls up and spins out whatever thoughts and feelings have been stagnating in you.
It unleashes Psychic Awareness, Emotional Release, and Spiritual Connection.
All of which amplifies the results of the healing sessions you experience when you are here in this energy.
2. Master Healers Are Drawn to Sedona to Do Their Work
The second part of the Sedona Effect is that because Sedona is such a powerful energy spot, amazing healers have been drawn here from all over the world to do their work. Over the past 17 years I have had practitioners working with me from South Africa, Germany, England, Holland, Ireland, Canada and of course, from all over the United States.
In speaking to any of them, you will always hear an incredible story of how they were called to Sedona. My favorite stories are ones about people who were from a completely different background – an airplane pilot, an accountant, a medical doctor, a high fashion model, or in my case, an attorney. Suddenly, something happened where the awareness came that life had to be changed and the change was made.
But most important, these are people who know how to connect with this energy and to utilize it for transformation.
3. Intense Desire (Energy) for Transformation
The third aspect of the Sedona Effect is the intense desire of people who come here for deep transformation. It is a palpable, powerful force of energy. Even if you are in turmoil, or especially if you are in turmoil, this is an energy that is huge and real. You know how it feels when you know you’ve GOT to do something, even though you might not know what it is. That’s what that energy feels like.
I had a really wonderful conversation a while back with someone who had just finished her Sedona Soul Adventure retreat. She told me she was absolutely amazed at what had happened in just 3 days. She said that before she came to Sedona she felt lost, plagued by constant fearful thoughts, not knowing her life purpose, and feeling this terrible feeling that she was running out of time to live her best life. After her adventure, her life was completely transformed — the fear was gone, she discovered her life purpose and knows she has the tools to live it fully and completely. All in 3 days – it’s almost unbelievable.
And the best part is, the changes are real and they last. Shortly after that, I got an email from someone who did a soul adventure 10 years ago and she was telling me how everything changed for her and the changes continue to this day. I love that so much.
The Sedona Effect can take you from where you are to where you want to be. Individuals come to us burned out, stressed out, at the end of their rope… and they leave happy, connected, knowing their life purpose and ready to live it.
We’ve had couples come who are on the brink of divorce and had their marriage completely turn around; we’ve had people who thought the love was gone, find the spark again; and we’ve had so many couples really take their love to the next level. 
The energies of Sedona are unique – not available anywhere else on the planet.
I hope you enjoyed this and if you did, please take the time to like it, share it with someone in your life who think might get something out of it and subscribe to our channel.

And If you want an even more direct path to getting happy and staying happy, click here to get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Spiritual Retreats today.
Or if you’d like to talk to someone about doing a retreat that’s custom designed for you call us at (928) 204-5988.
You can have the life  AND the relationship you want – I know it.

What is a Vortex and Why Should You Care?

Sedona is one of the most beautiful places on the planet (a few years ago, USA Today named Sedona “The most beautiful place to visit in the US”). But beyond its beauty, Sedona is known throughout the world for its vortex energy.
What is a Vortex?
A vortex is believed to be a special spot on the planet where higher dimensional energies are concentrated to such an extent that it can be felt by humans. These energies enhance the flow of energy (life force) in our own bodies – what the Chinese call “chi,” or the Hindus call “prana.”
Vortexes (or vortices if you want to be absolutely proper about it, but here in Sedona we all pretty much say “vortexes”) are found at sacred sites throughout the world – the Great Pyramid in Egypt, Machu Picchu in Peru, Bali, Stonehenge, etc. Many people believe that the vortex energies and the energy that flows through our subtle bodies is basically the same – that it is an Electro-magnetic energy.
In my experience, when you delve into definitions and explanations of what a vortex is, it seems to depend on who you’re talking to or what book you’re reading. If you speak with some scientists, they will tell you that this is electro-magnetic energy that can be measured, but that it is behaving in ways that are unusual and can’t be explained. If you speak with the indigenous peoples, e.g., the Native Americans here in Sedona or the Aborigines in Australia (because Ayers Rock (Uluru) is another one), they will tell you that these are places around the Earth where you can literally feel the energy of the Earth if you will take the time to do it.
Here is my own personal belief – after living in Sedona since the turn of the century and having traveled many times to Egypt, Bali and Peru, and experiencing those energies – I believe these are places around the world where the God energy (or the energy of the Universe or of All That Is, or whatever you want to call it) literally comes onto the planet and is brought onto the planet. That’s why these places are so incredible.
The Native Americans believe that the energy of Sedona is energy that can be used for Transformation. And I believe that’s why such amazing transformations can happen here in such a short period of time.
In addition, I believe the veils to other dimensions are thinner in Sedona. Our connection to All That Is is amplified and enhanced here. Bashar, the internationally recognized spiritual teacher, says this about Sedona:
“Sedona is a powerful, transformational vortex unparalleled in its own way, unique in its own way, that allows for communication and connection to multiple dimensions of reality on your world.”
Why should you care about the Vortex Energy?
Because if you’re looking for Transformation, Sedona is the place to get it. The energy is stronger here, it is the energy of transformation, the veils to other dimensions are thinner (so it’s easier to access other dimensions here) and whatever you bring here is Magnified and intensified. This is one of the reasons why people have such huge transformations here in such a short period of time.
The energies of Sedona are unique – not available anywhere else on the planet.
I hope you enjoyed this and if you did, please take the time to like it, share it with someone in your life who think might get something out of it and subscribe to our channel.

And If you want an even more direct path to getting happy and staying happy, click here to get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Spiritual Retreats today.
Or if you’d like to talk to someone about doing a retreat that’s custom designed for you call us at (928) 204-5988.
You can have the life  AND the relationship you want – I know it.

Saying “Goodbye” to Our Sweet Daisy

Our beloved Daisy passed away this past week and worse, she passed while we were in Egypt. I wasn’t able to be with her and that has been devastating for me.

In late January, we discovered that Daisy had lymphoma, with one tumor in her heart cavity and another on her spleen. At the time she told us through our pet psychic, Sharon, that “my work here isn’t done” and she felt very strongly that she could heal.

She told us she wanted us to do everything we could. We were working with two vets, our regular vet, who was doing chemo, and our homeopathic vet. She was taking 25 supplements and we were using Young Living oils on her, especially Frankincense on the location of the tumors, and putting her on the Bemer twice each day.

In the first week of chemo, it looked as if she was responding, as her white blood cell count went down dramatically and her red blood cell count increased dramatically. But by the third week, things were starting to go in the other direction.

We were in weekly contact with her through Sharon and just before we left for Egypt, she told us that she very much wanted to heal and felt that she would. The first week we were in Egypt her beloved caregiver, Terri, sent us a video of her romping and playing with the other dogs. And then in the second week she wasn’t interested in food. We did another session with Terri and Daisy said she still wanted to heal, but for the first time she said that if she didn’t, she could accept that.

She also told us that there was a white-gold light that she was starting to see that was making her feel really good and that our sweet Katie Kat (who passed last year just before the Egypt trip) was with her, helping her. She said “if I do go, I can’t go until you get back, it won’t be possible for me to go if I’m not with you.” But two days later, our sweet girl was gone.

We spoke with her tonight through Sharon and she told us that Katie Kat was still with her, helping her. At the time of her passing, Katie was saying to her “I’ve got you, we’re helping you, you won’t get lost, we’ve got you.” And then she said that she felt so much love on the other side and it just sort of took her in.

As Sharon said, “Katie Kat shows this force of love magnetizing her out of her body.” Isn’t that beautiful? And it struck me that in the ceremony that we do in King’s Chamber, at the end, I have each participant whisper in my ear “I am the mighty, living force of love.” And now, just 3 days later, Katie Kat was telling us about a “force of love” that was magnetizing Daisy out of her body and over to the other side.

Daisy was the sweetest, most wonderful dog. She was so beautiful and she absolutely loved everyone. She was a big golden retriever/yellow lab mix (100 pounds) and one of her things was that she was always jumping up on people. She would jump on people who would come to the house and strangers when we were hiking, and it was very overwhelming for a lot of people to have this hundred pound dog jump on them.

When I tried to get her to stop through training and speaking with Sharon, she told me “the people I jump on need more joy in their lives and I’m jumping on them to give it to them.” She simply wouldn’t stop the jumping, she just had to spread that joy around!

Her brother, Boulder, lives in Oak Creek Canyon with my dear friend Ranjita and it will be very comforting for me to spend time with him. They’re so identical that when they were running and jumping, I had to look at their collars to make sure who was who. But it will be bittersweet to be with him as well.
Daisy’s amazing entrance into my life…
I have felt so blessed to have had communication with Daisy throughout her entire life with the amazing people I’ve worked with. It has brought me to such an incredible appreciation of these beings and who they are. And it started with how Daisy came into my life in the first place.

Our beloved dog, Emma (a golden retriever/English springer spaniel mix), passed very suddenly 2 weeks before our Peru trip in 2009. She’d been having some pain in her shoulder and suddenly woke up at 5:30 am, vomited, and one hour later she was gone. We connected with an amazing psychic, Tara, and Emma told us “I’m going to help you find your next dog,” to which I responded, “I don’t want another dog, I want you.”

After we returned from Peru in April, we Googled “Golden retriever mix” and found breeders in Phoenix who breed dogs who are 3/4 Golden and 1/4 Yellow Lab. They had a wait list of over 30 people and said it would probably be 2 years until we could get a dog through them. They said they weren’t going to breed Honey until the fall, but then we suddenly received a group email from them saying that Honey had gone into heat.

They had sequestered her in their Arizona room, but a storm came up and a sudden gust of wind blew the door open, and they thought she and Luke had “done the deed”; if so, there would be puppies by July. We let them know we wanted one of the potential puppies and then received an email that they were quite surprised that all but one of the 30 people on the list said they still wanted a puppy, they just didn’t want one right now and that we could have one of the puppies.

One week after the puppies were born (are they the cutest or what?) we did another session with Tara to connect with Emma. We hadn’t told Tara about the puppies and suddenly when Emma came in, Tara said “what’s happening, Emma says you already have another puppy and she says, ‘How do you like how I blew the door open?’”

So our sweet Emma brought us our sweet Daisy.

In all the sessions with Sharon over the years, one of the things that came through all the time is that Daisy had a core wounding. Some of it came from a past life that she had with Boulder and I where there was a flood. Boulder and I were swept away and Daisy tried to save us, but Boulder and I drowned and Daisy died trying to save us. She felt that she hadn’t done enough and brought that “I’m not enough” into this lifetime.

When my ex-husband and I divorced, Daisy felt abandoned and that she had done something to cause it, and no matter what we told her and explained to her, just like children of divorce, she took that on and it intensified her feelings of “not-enoughness.” Sharon and I used to joke that Daisy needed a Soul Adventures retreat, because just telling someone they are enough isn’t enough for them to believe – they have to have something happen so that they “get it.”

No matter how much I told her or showed her that I loved her, it was never quite enough.

Somehow when my dear husband Richard came into our lives two years ago, Daisy fell in love again. She loved Richard so much and wanted to please him, and would always say she was trying to be a good girl for him, trying to be “good enough.”

Finally, in our last two sessions with Sharon, Daisy said she finally “got it.” She said she finally felt a complete love. She finally got it that she was good enough, that she didn’t have to do anything to be loved except to be her own sweet self. I’m sobbing as I write these words, because I love it so much that she finally really “got it” and I feel that’s part of what was able to allow her to go into the light.

It’s been so bittersweet these past two years, as we lost Richard’s dog, Prancer, eighteen months ago, then Katie Kat one year ago and now Daisy. That’s us hiking in Sedona shortly after Richard moved here. We still have our sweet Missy and we thank God for her.

Our four legged friends are such a blessing. They are their own little beings, with their own complexities and such a deep capacity for love. They bring us such joy and it’s so painful when they leave. Sharon said Daisy is still with me, licking my face like she used to, so I’m trying to feel that. I certainly feel her love.

I love you, Daisy, you were such a huge part of my life. Thank you for coming into my life and being with me. I will never forget you.

Greetings from Egypt!

Greetings from Egypt!
How is it possible that it’s been a year since I was here last and how is it possible that even though this is my 19th trip to Egypt (!), it’s still new and amazing?
But that’s the nature of this place. Everything we’re seeing is thousands and thousands of years old, but the mysteries are still fresh.
Mysteries such as who built the Pyramids? How did they get these huge stones to this place (some of which weigh over 2 tons) when they know they came from Aswan, which is an 8 hour train ride away? And how did they cut the stones with such laser-like precision that they fit together perfectly with no mortar?
Riding camels to the Pyramids is always so much fun – they’re so sweet. And of course it’s so wonderful to be here with my beloved Richard. This is his second trip to Egypt and he’s become as fascinated as I am with all things Egyptian! What a wonderful thing to have in common.
One of the most fascinating things we see here on the Giza plateau is the Solar Boat museum. This is a boat that was first discovered on January 12 (my birthday!), 1954. It was found completely unassembled and it is believed to be associated with the Pharaoh Cheops from over 4500 years ago. It was to be used to navigate the River to heaven after the death and resurrection of the Pharaoh.
It took 24 years for workmen to assemble the boat. Once assembled, the boat is 143 ft long and 19.5 ft wide. My photo simply doesn’t do it justice but can you get the perspective of seeing the two people on the right?
When it was found in this pit and the stones were first breached, there was a “whooshing” sound, indicating the boat had been “hermetically sealed” and it had lasted in pristine condition for over 4500 years. Now that it’s been found and assembled, no one has been able to figure out how to preserve it. It’s estimated that it will completely disintegrate within the next 100 to 200 years. The ancient Egyptians were able to preserve it for over 4500 years, modern man hasn’t been able to figure out to how to preserve it for more than a few hundred years!
Tonight we watched the amazing Sound and Light show at the Pyramids and Sphinx. It’s so dramatic, it’s reminiscent of The Ten Commandments. I love this photo that Richard shot – the Sphinx just looks otherworldly.
One of the best parts for me is being with this amazing group of people. We are all different ages, races, sexes, and nationalities, but with a commonality of being fascinated by this amazing place. It’s so much fun to experience this with other adventurers.
And as usual, the Egyptian people are so warm and welcoming. They always ask “where are you from?” and when I say “America,” they always reply with a similar response “We love Americans!”
This year’s tour sold out and we’re already planning the trip for next year. I already can’t wait to come back again!
If you have any interest at all in coming on this amazing trip, click here to get on our wait list and we’ll send you all the information as soon as it’s available.

Sending you so much love from mysterious Egypt!

I Know Who I Am, Now What Do I Do?

This is the second video on the Enneagram and in this one I’m going to talk to you about how to become the best you can be, meaning if you’re a Six, how can you be the best Six you can be?
I hope you watched my last video on the Enneagram and I hope you’ve taken the test to find out which Number or Style you are, because if you haven’t, this video isn’t going to make a lot of sense. So if you haven’t taken the test, stop now and take it here. It will take about 10 minutes.
Okay, so now that you know your number, or what I prefer to call Style, what do you do with that?
I’m an 8, we’re the fighters. The lie I’m wired to tell myself is “Life is hard, I have to do everything on my own. There’s no one to help. I have to fight for everything I have.”
Could that be any more depressing or any more rooted in the energy of Everything Is Wrong?
Eights are the fighters. They’re the ones that automatically get angry. They also always think they’re right. Now they’re also into justice and into fighting the good fight, but we are mainly just wired to fight.
My ex-husband, who I was married to for 20 years, is a 9. The peacemaker… peace at any price. So can you imagine, here’s me, an 8, fighting about everything, married to a 9, whose whole thing is peace at any price. It was sort of crazy-making because what always seemed to happen, is that all of our fights were never about the issue at hand, they were always about how it wasn’t okay for me to be angry. Nines don’t like anger.
The problem was, I actually bought into the idea that something was wrong with my anger. At this time in my life, I had decided I wanted to be a “spiritual person.” Somehow I had bought into the idea that being a “spiritual person” meant being sweet and compliant, and never getting angry. That I should be trying to act like a Goddess all of the time and speaking in a breathy voice, saying things like, “That’s so beautiful.” I never did any of that because I knew it would be completely phony – but I aspired to it.
I didn’t want to get angry.
I didn’t want to lose my temper.
Ironically, this was at the same time that I was becoming well-known as a divorce attorney. People would call me on the phone and say, “I hear you’re a real bitch. I want you to be my lawyer.” They actually meant it as a total compliment.
So hear I am on the phone, thinking “something is really off.”
When I finally found out about the Enneagram and realized that I am wired for this, I felt a kind of liberation. I realized that there was nothing wrong with my anger. That it was an important part of my life force. It had enabled me to survive a rough childhood, to build inner strength, and to take care of myself. I began to view my anger as an asset, not a weakness or something to be ashamed of.
Now with this knowledge, I also started working on ways to modulate my anger so that I wasn’t spewing it out all over everyone all of the time, but I also stopped trying to shove it down. I stopped being ashamed of it, and I stopped hating myself when I got angry.
And guess what happened? As soon as I stopped thinking there was something wrong with my anger, I stopped getting angry with everyone.
If we had been more consciously aware, the 8 and 9 combination could have been really great for both of us. Nines need to learn how to set boundaries and eights need to learn how to soften up their boundaries and just stop fighting.
The good news is that 6 years after my divorce, I met a 7 and we were married last year. He is so much fun, because he’s a 7. He also doesn’t ever want to be told what to do and there’s other stuff, because there’s always stuff going on in a relationship, but knowing all of this, we both step back all the time and go, “wait a minute – oh, that’s just your 8 stuff or that’s just your 7 stuff” and it makes such a huge difference in how we interact with each other and treat each other.
So how about you? What can help you best move into healing? Let’s go through each style
And remember, there are no good and bad styles.
The biggest thing is to focus on the parts you like. No one is completely healed or unhealed, we’re all a composite.
Style 1 – The Perfectionist

• Stop demanding that everything must be perfect.
• Relax more.
• Feel more compassion for people.
• Stop using the word “should.”
• As I used to say to one of my coaching clients who is a One, “Finished is better than perfect.”
• Appreciate that you are one of those people who wants things done in the best way possible.

Style 2 – The Helper

• Stop doing the things that you don’t want to do.
• Take care of yourself.
• Appreciate that you are full of love and genuinely want to help other people.
• Stop doing the things that you don’t want to do. If you truly want to do something for someone, do it without any expectation that they will return the favor. If that’s okay with you, then proceed.
• Take care of yourself. Do things that really feel like splurges and take care of yourself (get massages and manicures, buy yourself flowers, take time out alone).
• Appreciate that you are full of love and genuinely want to help other people.

Style 3 – The Achiever

• Decide what do I truly want?
• Don’t be so concerned about what other people think of you.
• Stop buying things that you think will impress other people.
• Stop working to the point of exhaustion.
• Allow yourself to feel vulnerable.
• Appreciate that you are hardworking and dependable.

Style 4 – The Romantic Adventurer

• When you start thinking that you are better than everyone else, stop it!
• Focus less on the idea that other people don’t understand you and instead make an effort to understand them.
• Create a morning exercise routine and then stick to it.
• Appreciate the fact that you are a very creative person and that you have a deep capability to connect with other people.

Style 5 – The investigator

• Remember that it’s impossible to know everything about everything.
• Stop trying to prove that you know everything.
• Stop correcting people when you are in small groups.
• Take up some kind of creative activity that will get you out of your head.
• Appreciate the fact that Albert Einstein was a Five.

Style 6 – The Loyalist

• Do things to counteract your pessimism and anxiety (physical exercise, meditation, reading inspirational books, music that makes you feel good, finding upbeat friends).
• Take yourself off the hook for the anxiety that you feel.
• Learn to cultivate trust in other people by first cultivating trust in yourself.
• Appreciate the fact that you are responsible and hardworking and loyal.

Style 7 – The Enthusiast

• Finish what you start.
• Each day make a list of two things to accomplish so that you always feel that you are getting things done.
• Realize that you don’t have to do everything or have everything right now.
• Don’t be afraid to face reality.
• Appreciate the fact that your basic disposition is one of happiness, optimism and generosity.

Style 8 – The Aggressor

• Rush to give in even when you “know” you’re right.
• Stop fighting with everyone.
• Understand that not everyone is against you.
• Forgive slights by reminding yourself that most people are just doing the best they can.
• Be vulnerable.
• Appreciate the fact that you are strong and self-reliant.

Style Nine – The Peacemaker

• Set boundaries.
• Understand that conflicts need to be dealt with.
• Exercise or do other things to help you come more fully into your body.
• Do things that will help you to really feel and express your emotions.
• Stop spending so much time in front of television screens or computer screens.
• Appreciate the fact that you are open-minded, diplomatic, and receptive.

The key here is to start taking yourself and everyone else off the hook. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have boundaries or that you don’t take responsibility for what you do. Quite the contrary, what I’m advocating is that you see how you’re wired and embrace all of it.
In our retreats here in Sedona, we use the Enneagram all the time because it gives people such insight, especially with couples. I can’t tell you the number of times that people get this information and they’re like “oh my gosh, this explains everything”.  
Just a few weeks ago we had two people come who had been fighting non-stop during their whole marriage. He felt like nothing he ever did was good enough, she felt like nothing he ever did was good enough, he was constantly angry with her and of course, she hated all that anger. It turns out she is a One (the perfectionist) and he’s and 8 (the Aggressor, the fighter).
When we discussed the two Styles with them, they both said, “Isn’t that how everyone is?” because we make this assumption that everyone reacts the way we do. She said “Doesn’t everyone want to have everything be perfect?” and he said, “Doesn’t everyone lash out in anger when they get upset?”
She really got it how her perfectionism was driving him away and he really got it how his anger was keeping them apart. With their other sessions, she was able to let go of some of her perfectionism (and also saw how it came from things that had happened during her childhood from her mother who was also a perfectionist).
We dug deep and found some of the core wounding that led to a lot of his anger and released it. Underneath the perfectionism and the anger, they discovered they really did love each other and when that happens, it really helps those things melt away. They took themselves off the hook and they took each other off the hook, and when you do that, everyone feels happier.
So that’s a lot! I hope you got some insights into who you are and how you can get happy and stay happy. And if you got value from this video, please like it, share the video with your friends and subscribe to our channel.

The #1 Secret to Keeping Love Alive (It’s Not Communication)

How to Find Out Who You Really Are

The basic idea of the Enneagram is that there is Nothing Wrong with you and there’s nothing wrong with anyone else, we’re all just wired differently to behave the way that we do. This is a big one to wrap your head around and I can hear you out there saying, “No, Debra that can’t be true, this person is terrible and this person is a liar, and this guy is a jerk.”
AND I WANT TO PUT IN A BIG CAVEAT HERE AROUND THE QUESTION:
What if a person has done something, like broken the law or is abusive? Isn’t that wrong?
In our discussion that Nothing Is Wrong, I’m not advocating that we go through life without boundaries, rules or laws. I was an attorney for over 20 years, and I have a deep belief in the rule of law. People who have violated our beliefs of what is moral or ethical (murder, rape, violence, theft, etc.) are to be held accountable, and their actions are not to be condoned.
But here, I’m talking about you. You and the people who are around you – your husband, your wife, your children, your friends, the normal everyday people that you run into, the people who are in your life.
And the concept that I’m talking about is that when we drop judgment about ourselves and others, it’s amazing what happens.
As Christ said, “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”
But that’s so hard to do when this person and that person are acting like such jerks!
This is why I love the Enneagram. Because it teaches us that we are wired to be who we are and everyone else is wired to be who they are. And it moves us into compassion, which allows you to shift how you look at yourself and others.
The Enneagram originated in the Middle East hundreds of years ago and was brought to the West by the Crusaders. Because monks kept the process alive during the Dark Ages, many Roman Catholics are aware of the Enneagram.
The Enneagram is a system for deeply understanding your basic personality…
What makes you tick?
What drives you?
What makes others tick and drives them?
It helps you to see that your quirks and patterns are just part of who you are and how you’re wired.
Here’s how it works. You take a test. It tells you which number you are – there are 9 numbers. I prefer to use the word “Style,” because people generally don’t like to be called “Numbers.”
Each Style represents a deep belief that an individual uses to help navigate their life, but these beliefs are actually lies that are holding the self back from a connection with happiness, love, and contentment. You aren’t telling yourself this lie consciously; it’s an unconscious belief that is usually buried very deeply. When you discover the lies that you are telling yourself, it’s as though the entire world opens up. When you discover the lies other people tell themselves, it brings you to a deep level of understanding and compassion for them.
When you are still operating your life based on a lie, you are operating as your unhealed self. Once you see the truth, you can move toward healing.
This information is vital because it tells you how you are wired. It helps you see that some of your quirks and patterns are a deep part of who you are and that you don’t necessarily choose them. It doesn’t mean that you don’t accept responsibility – quite the contrary. By taking total responsibility, you can take this information and use it for transformation.
In an interesting book I read about the Enneagram, the author said that there is an “initial shock” in finding out exactly who you are – and he’s exactly right. It was a shock to find out not only how I do things, but to also discover how other people do things.
And that’s another interesting part. I see all of the time how almost everyone assumes that others will react in the same way that they do to a particular situation. Nothing could be further from the truth. In a small group that we organized around the Enneagram in Sedona, we made a point to talk about particular situations and our individual reactions to them. I was stunned to discover how differently people responded. A situation that would make me incredibly angry, for example, would be absolutely no problem for someone else.
At this point, I want you to take the test. The information is here on the video for the website you go to to take the free test. I don’t want your test to be influenced by any of the things I’m about to say in talking about the different Styles.
Go here to take the test now.
If you hit a question where you’re not sure, answer it as you would have at the age of 25. If you’re younger than 25, just answer how you feel, if you’re older than 25, answer it as you would have at age 25.
Stop and take the test. It will take about 10 minutes.

Start here after you’ve taken the test.
Did you take it? If you didn’t, stop and take it because it’s really, really important.
Now you know what number, or what I will call your Style, you are.
What I’m going to do is go through each of the Styles and talk about the healed aspects and the unhealed aspects. Now – I don’t know anyone who is completely healed or completely unhealed. We kind of go back and forth at different times.
It’s also important to understand that there are no good or bad numbers. Nothing Is Wrong with any of the Numbers or Styles. It’s just the way that we’re all wired to navigate the world. Everyone is different and everyone is uniquely fascinating.
Style One – The Perfectionist
The lie they are telling themselves is, “Everything has to be perfect for me to be happy.”
It’s easy to see what a set up this is for having an unhappy life, if you are telling yourself that “Everything has to be perfect for me to be happy.”

• Unhealed Ones are: critical, controlling, anxious
• Healed Ones are: ethical, honest, high-principled, ambitious

You know if you are a perfectionist or if you have one in your life.
Style Two – The Helper
The lie they are telling themselves is, “I have to do things for people for them to love me.”

• Unhealed Twos are: passive aggressive, possessive, manipulative, irrational
• Healed Twos are: warm, loving, caring, giving, adaptable

Healed Twos are fantastic friends — they will do things for you and care for you, but if they’re unhealed, they give with a hook… they’re always expecting something back and they won’t tell you what they’re expecting back. They’re the ones who say, “If you really love me, you know what I want and I shouldn’t have to tell you.”
And the Two’s out there are sitting there going, “Well, yeah,” and the rest of us are going, “No, tell us what you want, we love you, we want to give it to you.”
Style Three – The Achiever
The lie they are telling themselves is, “I must work hard, do well, and look good to be happy.”

• Unhealed Threes are: driven, dishonest, pretentious, vain, consumed by what others think about them
• Healed Threes are: optimistic, efficient, energetic, practical

These are the people who have to have designer everything, but they are also the most social and a lot of fun, and usually very, very successful, because they’re achievers.
Style Four – The Romantic Adventurer
The lie they are telling themselves is, “I must be different and special to matter.”

• Unhealed Fours are: depressed, moody, self-absorbed, temperamental
• Healed Fours are: romantic, expressive, supportive, compassionate

Fours think they’re special and they think that nobody gets them; healed fours are very romantic and creative.
Style Five – The Investigator
The lie they are telling themselves is, “I must know everything about everything in order to be happy.”

• Unhealed Fives are: stubborn, negative, secretive, distant, arrogant about what they know
• Healed Fives are: independent, inventive, wise, perceptive

Einstein was a 5.
Style Six – The Loyalist
The lie they are telling themselves is, “By being loyal to someone or something else, I will be taken care of.”

• Unhealed Sixes are: anxious, controlling, paranoid, insecure
• Healed Sixes are: loyal, practical, responsible, self-reliant, team players

Sixes are the most anxious, I mean think about it – if you believe your happiness lies with someone else, that can put you in a state of constant anxiety. But if they’re healed they are wonderful team players; they are great employees.
Style Seven – The Enthusiast
The lie they are telling themselves is, “I must avoid pain to be happy.”                                                                                      

• Unhealed Sevens are: possessive, manic, restive, narcissistic, scattered and don’t want to look at problems
• Healed Sevens are: spontaneous, versatile, enthusiastic

Sevens are the Happiest of the Styles. One of my good friends is a 7 and she is so much fun to be around.
Style Eight – The Aggressor
The lie they are telling themselves is, “I have to fight for everything I have.”

• Unhealed Eights are: angry, aggressive, confrontational, grudge holders, think they are right about everything
• Healed Eights are: courageous, direct, self-reliant, self-confident, decisive

I’m an 8. I’ll talk more about that later.
Style Nine – The Peacemaker
The lie they are telling themselves is, “I must have peace at any price.”

• Unhealed Nines are: stubborn, obsessive, judgmental, complacent, passive-aggressive, defensive
• Healed Nines are: creative, accepting, trusting, supportive

Nines are doing everything they can to control situations so as not to disturb the peace

So that’s a lot to take in. Sit with it a little while and in the next video, I’m going to talk to you about how all this can help you and I’ll tell you all about How I Went from Being an Unhappy Eight and Stopped Fighting with Everyone.
I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did and if you got value from this video, please like it, share the video with your friends and subscribe to our channel.

And if you want a more direct path to getting and staying happy – then go to SedonaRetreatGuide.com and get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Couples Retreats today.
Or if you’d like to talk to someone about doing a retreat that’s custom designed for you call us at 928/204-5988.
You can have the life AND the relationship you want – I know it.

Do you have a Divine Connection?

If you’ve been following along, you know that in these series of videos, I’m talking about concepts from my book, The Journey to Happy– How Embracing the Concept that Nothing is wrong can transform your life.
In my book, I talk a lot about Connection, because I believe that’s what’s causing a huge amount of problems that people have today. People feel disconnected from other people, even from their own families… they feel disconnected from the larger society… many people even feel disconnected from themselves, and I say that because so many people hate themselves or dislike themselves. 
And then there’s the disconnect that results in all the negativity it feels like we’re surrounded by all the time.
What causes that? Why do people come at things from either a “glass half empty” or “glass half full” point of view? We know from the Enneagram (which I talk about in some other videos) that some of this is about how we’re wired, but there are also things that happen to us as we go through life.
My own personal belief is that when we come onto the planet, we all come here – and I mean all of us come here – with a divine spark, a divine connection.
The Bible says that we are created in the image and likeness of God. Hinduism teaches that our Souls are Godlike.
I see this Divine connection that we all have as this beautiful jewel that is perfect and strong, and cannot be destroyed.
But then stuff starts to happen.
Mud & Gunk get splattered all over until all we can feel is the mud and the gunk
until it gets buried so deeply that we don’t even realize that it’s there anymore. All we can see and feel is the mud and the gunk. We lose that connection to the Divine and that feels really awful. It’s in that disconnected state that people can do some pretty terrible things.
I don’t know if this story is true, or just a teaching that I’ve heard many times, but I love this story… A monastery in Asia had a large, beautiful statue of the Buddha made entirely of pure gold. There was a war and the monks knew that their monastery was about to be invaded. They decided that to save the statue, they would cover it over with mud and make it look like a simple ceramic statue. Many years passed and after a few generations, everyone completely forgot that the statue was made of gold. One day the statue was being moved and it was dropped. The stucco cracked. And underneath was the beautiful brilliant gold!
I especially love two things about this story. The primary thing is that the “real” Buddha, the golden one, is hidden underneath all of the gunk. Just like with you, the real (golden) you is underneath all that gunk. The other part is that it takes a cracking in the exterior coat of gunk for the real you to burst forth and be seen.
I believe the trials and tribulations we all experience are just a set up for the cracking to take place. I had to reach my lowest point before I started to crack. Alcoholics Anonymous talks about hitting “rock bottom” before addicts are willing to do something to heal their addiction. The Bible talks about God being able to more easily come through “the cracked vessel.”
If you are reading this and are in a place in your life right now where everything seems to be wrong, let me tell you that I feel your pain. That’s exactly where I was almost 20 years ago when I first came to Sedona. Every area of my life was messed up – work, marriage, money, body… I know how awful it is. I know what it feels like to not want to drag yourself out of bed to face another day.
But the truth is, sometimes that can be the most incredible place to start, being the cracked vessel, because it means you can allow your Divine Connection to get activated again.
Because – and here’s the important part – it’s always been there, it’s never gone away, it’s always been with you. It’s that beautiful jewel that is perfect and strong, and cannot be destroyed.
So how can you connect back up with it? The first part is to start believing it’s there in first place.
Can you do that? Can you take that Leap of faith?
I’m not saying you have to do a complete 180 degree turn here, but could you just try this idea on for size? Because I’ll tell you, there’s a lot of relief when you do that. Just sit with the idea that you have this Divine Connection, that it’s really there and you just to have to connect with it.
And then you’re probably going to need to do something with clearing the mud and gunk… I’ve given you a bunch of processes in these series of videos for how to start doing that with things like Discover the Patterns, Enneagram, and Meditation.
But if you have some heavy duty mud and gunk like I did, you may want to think about coming out Sedona to do a retreat, because we’ll clean that gunk out and bring you back into connection in just a matter of days.
We had a woman here a few years ago who told us, “I hate everything. I hate my husband, I hate my kids, I hate my job. I hate everything. And I’m mad at everybody.”
When we dug a little deeper, we discovered that what was really going on was that she was mad at God. She had two really wonderful, loving parents and they were both killed in a car accident when she was young. She was in the car and she was hurt, but she wasn’t killed. That, of course, completely shattered her world and it resulted in her being so angry because, of course, her thinking was, how could a loving God have done this to her? He must hate her, so okay, she hated him right back.
She also had this huge amount of grief and guilt over the fact that she lived and her parents died, and that resulted in her hating herself for having survived. So here she was, walking around all these years with all this mud and gunk, all this hate, guilt and shame. Of course her Divine Connection felt like it was completely gone.
We did a bunch of sessions with her to clear out the mud and gunk. First to help her to see that the car accident was not her fault. She of course knew that mentally, but before this, she didn’t really get it on a deep level, she didn’t really believe it.
And then we helped her to clear out all that hate, guilt and shame.
But the best part came during her Inner Journey with Breath. The breath took her into the altered state and suddenly, she was there with both her parents. She told me it reminded her of the Harry Potter book where he saw both of his parents in the mirror. She totally felt their presence and was completely filled with love from both of them. But then she said something else happened…
She was filled with this deeper knowing, this deeper love, and she said she felt what seemed to her to be the presence of God. I asked her to describe it and she said there weren’t really any words, that the best way to describe it was that she felt completely filled up with love, that this huge hole that had been there forever felt like it was filled. She was sobbing during the breath journey and she was crying when she was telling me about it because it was so incredibly beautiful.
She came out saying, “It’s so weird, I came here hating everyone, including myself and God, and I’m leaving here just full of love for everyone and everything.” She had made that connection with that Divine part of herself. That was a few years ago and it still feels very real and strong for her.
We all have that – we just have to believe it and take steps to connect with it.

I hope this video makes you feel a little happier and if it did, please like, share the video with your friends and subscribe to our channel.
And if you want a more direct path to getting and staying happy – then go to SedonaRetreatGuide.com and get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Couples Retreats today.
Or if you’d like to talk to someone about doing a retreat that’s custom designed for you call us at 928/204-5988.
You can have the life AND the relationship you want – I know it.

How to Have a Personal Breakthrough Just by Breathing

In these series of videos, I’m talking about concepts from my book
“The Journey to Happy– How Embracing the Concept that Nothing is wrong can transform your life”…
Processes that can help you feel a lot happier right away and help you to flip the switch into a better feeling state.
In the last video, I spoke about how doing 5 minutes of deep breathing every day, and doing deep breathing throughout the day, can really make a difference in your life.
Today, I want to tell you about a very special kind of breath that has literally changed my life and changed the lives of thousands of people.
It’s a form of breath that I call Inner Journey Breath. You might find similar methods that are called Rebirthing, Connected Breath or Holotropic Breathwork, all of these are somewhat similar.
It’s a process where you do connected breathing, meaning there is no stopping between the inhale and exhale and what happens when you do this is you do not hyperventilate. Instead, if the process is done correctly, you can literally go into an altered state of consciousness. 
I first found this in 1989, but the process that I first found was called Rebirthing. These processes were pioneered and developed by Leonard Orr and Sondra Ray for Rebirthing and Stanislav Grof, who is a psychiatrist. Grof had used LSD with his clients when it was still legal and his clients had incredible, transformation experiences going into these altered states.
One of the people who used LSD in this way was Cary Grant, of all people, and he talks about how life changing it was for him. After LSD was outlawed, Grof believed there had to be a way to replicate the experience and he started studying the Vedas and other texts, and learned about the yogis in India who were able to do such incredible things with their breath. When he did this with his patients, they had absolutely remarkable experiences.
So… What happens? It’s different for everyone.
In over 25 years that I’ve been doing breathwork, I’ve experienced:

• Seeing visions
• Release of emotional pain
• Release of energetic blocks
• Release of birth trauma
• Release of physical pain
• Connection with my High Self
• Connection with my Angels & Guides
• Connection with souls who have crossed over
• Receive information on problems and situations
• Sense of peace
• Enormous gratitude
• Deep knowing that All is Well and Nothing Is Wrong

Over the past 16 years, we have developed a process here at Sedona Soul Adventures that we call Inner Journey with Breath. It’s a very important process that we do with almost everyone who comes here to do a Soul Adventure because it’s so incredibly powerful.
We have had so many people over the years who have had such incredible experiences because for many of them, it is the first time in their lives that they have truly experienced the Divine – feeling like God is truly with them and part of them, and truly experienced their own Divine nature.
We had a medical doctor here a number of years ago and her breath journey was just out of this world! She saw visions, she actually communicated with her mother who had crossed over, and then she saw and felt and truly experienced the perfection that was her. She went home and told her other doctor friends about what had happened and they all said, “They must have given you a drug, did you drink anything during the session?” And she said yes, she drank water and they said, “Yes! They must have slipped LSD into your water.” Which, of course, we did not do.
Another woman got finished with her breath journey and at the end as she was talking about her experience, she said “I felt like I levitated.” Her practitioner teased her a little and said, “Yes, you were about 3 ft off the ground,” and she said, “I knew it!” She really felt that she had levitated.
Another person when she got done, lifted up the mat she was lying on and said where is the electrical cord that made the mat vibrate so much. She was vibrating so much that she was sure that there must have been electricity making it happen.
But for me, the most wonderful occurrences are those when people really experience that highest part of themselves, and when they really experience the Divine on all levels – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.
Have you ever had an experience like that? There really aren’t words to describe it.
I first discovered this back in 1989 at a really low time in my life. I had recently gotten divorced, I had jumped immediately into another relationship that was disastrous, I was working way too hard… but the biggest thing I suddenly discovered was my Co-dependency. One of my good friends actually staged an intervention and I entered a 12-step Co-dependency treatment program. It was an outpatient program that was supposed to go for 4 weeks, but at the end of 4 weeks they decided I needed to do at least 6.
It helped me a lot ,but at the end of the 6 weeks I just felt terrible. They kept telling us “you will always be like this” and that was just really depressing. I decided to treat myself to a massage with a new therapist I had heard about. I went for the massage and told her what had been going on with me and it turned out she was actually a Rebirthing practitioner. I did one session with her…I went into the altered state, I experienced the Divine and my own perfection, and I can hardly describe the Joy and Love that was just suddenly gushing through me.
Back then, it was felt that you needed to do the process once per week for 10 weeks with a certified practitioner – and I did that with her. Every week my joy and happiness was just increasing exponentially.
One of the after care things I was doing from my Co-dependency treatment was to go to meetings each week of Adult Children of Alcoholics. Every week we would each go around the circle talking about how we were doing and everyone every week had the same old stories, the same struggles and the same difficulties.
After the very first breathwork, I described my experience and then the next week I talked about it again. After the third week of gushing about all the love, joy and happiness I was feeling, the person next to me said, “Well, I’m not feeling as good as DEBRA is,” and after the next week, I realized I just couldn’t go back there again. Everyone else was still stuck; none of them were interested in even trying the breathwork, they were just interested in staying stuck. Which was fine, it’s a free country, everybody gets to be just as miserable as they want.
But I had found what seemed to me to be the path to everything I was looking for and that was over 25 years ago. I still do breathwork regularly, in fact I just did it again a few weeks ago. It’s amazing to me how different it is every single time.
But the best part is that this has become a cornerstone of the work that we do here at Sedona Soul Adventures. People have such incredible experiences and then we teach them how to continue to do it at home. I love it so much when someone emails me and tells me about an amazing experience they’ve had.
Don’t start doing this on your own. A breath journey is not something that you should do on your own. It’s not like the yogic breath or the breath of fire that many people are familiar with in yoga. It’s a connected breath and one that is designed to take you into an altered state, so doing it alone when you do it for the first time, is never recommended. In fact, Dr. Grof believes no one should ever do it alone because so many people have abandonment issues that come up, that when they come out of the altered state and they’re alone, that can be traumatic.
The most important is to do the process with someone who is specially trained in doing this process. If you want to find someone in your area, try searching “Breathwork practitioner” on Google and hopefully you can find someone.
Or even better, come to Sedona and experience the Breath Journey as part of your Soul Adventures. We have so many fantastic breathwork practitioners, they will lead you on an incredible journey.


I hope this video makes you feel a little happier and if it did, please like, share the video with your friends and subscribe to our channel.
And if you want a more direct path to getting and staying happy – then go to SedonaRetreatGuide.com and get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Couples Retreats today.
Or if you’d like to talk to someone about doing a retreat that’s custom designed for you call us at 928/204-5988.
You can have the life AND the relationship you want – I know it.