1. Affirmations must be positive statements

Write “I love my husband!” as opposed to “We aren’t going to have anymore fights.” The Universe doesn’t hear a negative. When hearing, “We aren’t going to have any more fights,” the Universe receives, “Fights. Okay, send them more fights!”

2. Make it a personal statement

Use “I” when referring to yourself or “we” when referring to a couple so that the Universe knows that you’re not talking about someone else.

3. Write Affirmations in the present tense

This is probably one of the biggest things — Many people make the mistake of writing Affirmations in the future tense, e.g., “Someday I’ll have a nice house.” Instead, write “I have a  beautiful home,” as if it were already exactly as you want it.
In addition to that, keep the following critical steps in mind:

1. Feel good while you’re doing it. If it doesn’t feel good, stop doing it.
2. Make it as specific as possible without feeling like you are making it up.
3. You need to believe that there is at least a kernel of Truth in what you’re saying.

Affirmations work because you’re establishing a direct connection with the energy of the Universe. However, if you don’t actually believe what you’re writing or saying, you can do more harm than good, because you’re increasing the energy of what you don’t want.
For example, if you feel like you hate your spouse, your relationship is horrible, and you feel unloved and misunderstood, the moment you write an affirmation such as “I love and adore my husband, he loves and adores me, and we are gloriously happy,” your subconscious mind will rebel against the lie and you’ll begin to think, “We’re NOT gloriously happy, we’re completely miserable, and I wish he would just drop off the face of the Earth!” These thoughts perpetuate feelings of anger, frustration, bitterness, and hopelessness.
Instead, use an Affirmation that is leading to where you want to be. For example, “There is a part of me that loves my husband. There is a part of my husband that loves me. We are connecting with the love that we have for each other.”
Or, if you’re deeply in debt and you want more money, if you start out with an affirmation that says “I have 10 million dollars,” your mind is going to immediately go into the opposite energy. Try something like, “My life is growing more and more abundant every day,” and see how that feels and how things start to change.
Find a statement that has at least a kernel of truth in it and make it as specific as you can without being false. If you start to feel bad while you’re writing it, that emotion is telling you that this is not the correct Affirmation. Keep trying until you find one that feels true, real, specific, and hopeful. This can bring you into the energy of connection really fast. And when you’re in the energy of connection, everything is possible.
A number of years ago, I was producing a spiritual workshop and I was talking to lots of people trying to get them to co-sponsor it with me. I started writing the affirmation, “Everyone I talk with is very interested in what I have to say.” Within just a few weeks, I got more sponsors than I had even hoped for — but the other thing I started seeing, was that I was suddenly getting a whole lot of attention from men that was unwanted because I was in a happy relationship. I realized I had to make the affirmation more specific because it was working too well!
I hope this video makes you feel a little happier and if it did, please like, share the video with your friends and subscribe to our channel.
And If you want a more direct path to getting and staying happy – then go to SedonaRetreatGuide.com and get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Couples Retreats today.
Or if you’d like to talk to someone about doing a retreat that’s custom designed for you call us at 928/204-5988.
You can have the life AND the relationship you want – I know it.

• Reducing  stress
• Reducing pain
• Boosting energy
• Headaches
• Coping with emotional problems such as low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety
• Improving athletic performance
• Improving sleep
• Weight loss

When I do tapping, it just makes me feel good.
If you would like to read all about it, there are thousands of websites and books on the subject. Suffice it to say, it’s easy and it works. I’m giving you the basic information you need to know so that you can start using this powerful tool in your life right now.
There is long form and short form – we will do both.
1. Identify the precise issue
What exactly is blocking you from your happiness? I will tell you that after all of these years of working with people, I have found that almost everyone has some sort of issue or fear that maybe they’re not good enough. It shows up in different ways, but that’s the underlying thought, so we’ll use that as the issue.
From that we come up with our tapping statement – so for this let’s identify it as: “I’m not good enough.”
2. Check in and rate your level of dissatisfaction
Close your eyes and check in with yourself. Rate how you feel about this issue on a scale of 0-10, with zero representing no dissatisfaction or upset, and ten representing that this really bothers you, or you feel like you’re wasting your life. Make a note of that number so you can compare it to how you feel when you complete the tapping.
3. Start Tapping
You will tap in nine places. Here’s the Tapping Points Illustration:

First, at the karate chop point, tap and as you tap, say 3 times: “Even though I’m not good enough, I deeply and profoundly love, accept, and respect myself just the way I am.”
Then you move to your Eyebrow – from the end of the eyebrow toward your nose.

• Eyebrow – in the opposite direction away from the nose.
• Under the eyes where you feel the bone.
• Under the nose.
• The chin where there is a crease.
• At the collarbone (the knot at the end of the collar bone toward the center of your body – marked on the illustration as the “sore spot”).
• Heart chakra – on the breastbone in the middle of your chest.
• Under your arm – where the bra would be if you wear a bra. Tap on just one side.

4. Complete the Tapping and check in
When you are complete, check in to see how you feel. On a scale of zero to ten, where are you now?
Your goal is to get to zero or 2, many people get there after doing just one round. If you are at 1 or 2 usually within 24 hours, you will be down to zero.
5. Have other issues come up?
Very often, as you are tapping, some other issue might come up. For example, the thought may come up, “I’m not a nice person.” That’s a separate issue. So do another round on that.
As more and more issues come up, tap through each one. Give yourself the time that you need to tap through these issues as they come up. Do an entire round for each issue.
There is also the Short Form of Tapping…
At least three times each day (when I wake up, once during the day, and before bed) I tap the karate chop point and say three times, “I deeply and profoundly love, accept, and respect myself just the way I am.” It is incredibly powerful.
If I’m in the middle of a meeting and I’m not feeling great about what’s going on, I’ll go into the bathroom and do the tapping. I’ve seen things literally shift before my eyes by doing this.
The objective of this process is to release you from the energy of what’s bothering you and to move you back into the energy of excited expectation. This will work on any kind of issue.
We teach tapping on a very deep level in our retreats. We teach couples to use it when they’re starting to have an argument and it’s miraculous! My husband and I use that all the time. We’ve had clients who have had amazing weight loss who credit it to the tapping. They haven’t changed their diet and exercise, they’ve changed how they feel about their body and that’s what made all the difference!
Start using the tapping – it works!
I hope this helped, and if you got value from this video, please like, share the video and subscribe to our channel.
And If you want a more direct path to getting happy – then go to SedonaRetreatGuide.com and get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Spiritual Retreats today.
Or better still, call us at (928) 204-5988.
You can have the life AND the relationship you want – I know it.

Or have you looked back over your life and noticed that you seem to do the same things over and over again, making some bad choices over and over again?
I was a divorce attorney for over 20 years and one of the things that happened during that time is that I had some clients that I did 3 divorces for! And the amazing thing was, what I noticed is that they were marrying the same person over and over again, they just had a different name. And what I also discovered is that if their father was an alcoholic, they would end up marrying alcoholics, or if their mother was withholding and couldn’t express love, they would marry someone who was – you guessed it – withholding and couldn’t express love. I now see this all the time with people who come here to Sedona Soul Adventures to do our retreats.
It doesn’t make any sense when we think about it rationally, but when you think about it from an emotional and spiritual standpoint, it makes perfect sense. With a childhood like that, you take on the belief that you’re not loveable and your soul is looking to heal that wound so it finds someone to bring that up for healing. You keep finding people that bring up that old wound of making you feel like you’re not loveable. It’s a vicious cycle if you don’t do something about it.
So the key for this, is to discover the patterns that you took on as a child that are still affecting you.
This process is quick and it is so enlightening. When I first did it, I couldn’t believe it. Here’s what you do:
Look at the top 6 areas of your life and look at how these same things were for your parents:

1. Life
2. Spirituality
3. Work
4. Money
5. Relationships
6. Body

Here were my answers when I first did this…
Life
My Parents: Life is hard
Me: Life is hard
Spirituality
My Parents: Believed in God
Me: Believe in a Higher Power
Work
My Parents: You have to work really hard and do things you don’t like to make money and support yourself.
Me: I was working really hard and doing things I didn’t like (practicing law) to make money and support myself.
Money
My Parents: Made a lot of money. Spent a lot of There was never enough. My mother would sit at the dining room table and write out checks to pay bills and say, “There’s not enough!”
Me: Made a lot of money. Spent a lot of money. Never enough. Amazingly, I would also sit at the dining room table and write out checks to pay bills and say, “There’s not enough!”
Relationships
My Parents: Marriage is hard. Parents are distant, Father is working nights and completely unavailable.
Me: I was already divorced by this time. I kept finding unavailable men. My first boyfriend was away at college. My first husband was in law school and studying all the time. My second husband was from Holland and we had a long distance relationship until we got married. After that marriage ended, I had a relationship with an American who lived in Tokyo.
Body
My Parents: My mother was constantly dieting, and as my father aged, he became morbidly obese. He would go on diets and lose 30-40 pounds and then would go off the diet and gain it all back and more.
Me: I was put on my first diet when I was 12, even though I wasn’t fat. I would continually go on diets and lose 20 pounds, and then I would go off the diet and gain it all back and more.
Although I thought I was completely different from my parents, I was completely like them in terms of how everything in my life was manifesting. When I realized that I was even sitting at the dining room table writing out checks to pay bills and saying, “There’s not enough,” I was totally, completely stunned. These patterns are set in ways that we don’t even realize until we start to consciously look at them.

In this series of videos, I’m talking about concepts from my book The Journey to Happy– How Embracing the Concept that Nothing is wrong can transform your life.
I hope you’ve been following along with these videos about the concept of Nothing is Wrong, because that will make all this make a lot more sense.
So let’s recap…
Everything is energy.
You are creating your reality in every moment (whether you believe it or not).
You are sending out energy and vibrations in every moment.
Quantum Physics is proving that even focusing attention on something changes it.
When you think about something, you get more of it. If you’re worried about something, you bring it faster. If you’re excited about something, you bring it faster.
What you resist persists. What you fight gets bigger and bigger because you are pouring more and more energy into whatever it is that you are fighting.
When you allow yourself to, you can move into the energy of All That Is. You can move into the energy of All Possibilities. From that place, you can discover almost magical possibilities.
Last time I spoke with you about how important the way you think is – As Henry Ford said, “There are 2 types of people in the world, those who think they can and those who think they can’t, and they’re both right!”        
If you want to get happy, you need to start thinking like a person who thinks they can.
And if you want to get really happy, you need to understand your emotions and how important they are because…

Your Emotions Are the Most Powerful Tools You Can Use for Finding Your Way to Happiness

In every moment, our emotions are telling us how we’re feeling, but even more importantly, they’re telling us how we’re flowing energy, how we’re vibrating.
Although these ideas may seem complicated, they’re really very simple. You’re either feeling good, or you’re feeling bad. It’s pretty much as simple as that. We have all of these names for emotions. We have ones that have been labeled “good” – happiness, joy, bliss, contentment, peace – and you have ones that have been labeled “bad” – anger, depression, frustration, rage, worry, anxiety, despondency.
In every moment, you have the ability to move toward good feelings or bad feelings. And this is so important because good feelings move us into the higher energetic vibrations that bring you the things you want – happiness, contentment, peace, and joy. Negative feelings take you in the opposite direction.
So the great news here is that you can change things around.
Listen to this fascinating study…
Sonja Lyubomirsky, is a Professor of Psychology, at the University of California and she studies and does research on happiness. According to her research, 50% of happiness is determined by your “set point,” or genetics, and 10% is determined by your circumstances (finances, health, living situation). The other 40% is based on your own intentional efforts to become happier.
So there are 2 things about this that I find incredibly interesting.
One is that only 10% is determined by your circumstances, like your money situation, because I think so many people believe that there are things that would make them happy – like money, finding the perfect relationship, having a perfect body, etc.
But the most important thing is that 40% is based on your own intentional efforts to become happier. That’s fantastic! That means that you have a whole lot of control over your level of happiness.
So that’s what I’m talking with you about in this series of videos, giving you ideas and processes you can use right now to get happy. Look for these videos to get simple but effective ways that you can take control of that 40%. That can make all the difference.
We had a man here a few years ago and he came to us saying that he was completely controlled by his emotions – he would get angry, he would get upset, he would lash out at this wife, his children, the people he worked with, even his friends. It was ruining his life, his wife was ready to leave, his children were afraid of him, and he had been placed on probation at work, with another outburst they were going to fire him.
His position was that he simply could not control it. He had a bad case of what my friend Jill used to call the “I Can’t Help Its.” But what was even worse, he hated himself every time he lashed out at someone, especially someone he loved.
He had gone to a psychiatrist and more than one therapist. They determined that he was not mentally ill, he was not bipolar, but nothing they did really helped him for long.
When he came to us, we figured out 2 things right away. He had a younger brother who had died in a car accident when he was 6 and his brother was 5. He loved his brother and he had never been able to really grieve for him, his parents just didn’t know how to handle that. And not only that, his parents, in their own unhealed grief, always talked about the brother as though he were a saint, and so John was always made to feel like he could never live up to the memory of his brother. We discovered that he had all this deeply buried anger and rage at is brother for leaving him and also for setting him up as the not-good-enough brother.
He said to us “this is crazy, how can I be angry with my brother for dying, I’m sure he didn’t want to die, it’s insane for me to be angry with him.” From a rational standpoint that’s true, but when you’re 6 years old, you’re not thinking rationally and these things go in so deeply. We did a bunch of processes to release the anger and grief, and at one point, he said he could feel his 6-year-old self finally feeling the grief he had felt all those years ago, and he felt it just lift off him.
We also figured out that he is an Eight on the Enneagram. If you don’t know what that means, that’s fine, just look for my video on the Ennegram. The Eight is the Aggressor, the Fighter. I’m an Eight and what that means is that we’re wired to fight and to protect what we have. It’s not a character defect, it’s a basic wiring that he came in with. When he found this out about himself it was as if a light bulb went on. He said, “this explains so much about everything that has happened in my life.” He dropped all the judgment he had about himself
So before he came to us, he was filled with all this anger and rage that he didn’t even know was there, and he hated himself because of the way he acted and he believed he had no control over any of it. When he left, the anger and rage were gone and he had a new deep love for himself. He went home and started using the simple tools we gave him to use when he would notice his emotions starting to turn negative or hostile. He discovered how even with just stopping to take a deep breath, he just didn’t go there anymore. You can imagine how everyone around him reacted. He brought his wife out to do a couples retreat, he had both of his adult children do retreats and even 2 people from his work came to do retreats. They saw the incredible changes in him and they all said “I want some of that.”
So if you would like some of that, I want to encourage you to reach out to us. Come to Sedona and let us custom design a retreat for just exactly what you need.
Go to SedonaRetreatGuide.com and get your complimentary copy of The Sedona Guide to Spiritual Retreats today.
Or better still, call us at (928) 204-5988.
You can have the life AND the relationship you want – I know it.